Tuesday, 28th July 2020
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“Dear Diary,
A few weeks ago, I tried killing myself. Not over the gambling that I have been overdoing but over the job at Cobh. Management itself. Nobody at the club or anybody for that matter found out, fortunately. They never will either. I didn’t like poison, it made me sick, and - as you can tell - the suicide attempt failed and I didn’t not live to regret it. Thankfully.
As a result though, I had a retching laburnum seed hangover for days and a face paler than Roy Keane’s kneecaps. On top of that, a strange new sensation, like a scar on the vision after staring at a brightness too long. Every time I awoke I had a tune with me, every day for the rest of my life. It sounds dubious I know but it’s true. A song, always a different one, accompanied me, on every single new day.
The first morning after the green and black laburnum seeds, me retching more vomit than a vomit-making factory on overtime, had
Tomorrow Never Knows by The Beatles haunting my return to living.
My dreams had been weird - not so surprising really, with poison chundering away inside me - consisting mostly of the Cobh team winning the 2032 Champions League. Oh, not forgetting me, John, Paul, George and Ringo in the team too incidentally, and doing a lap of honour round the pitch. Ringo I remember was particularly giddy. I always preferred him, he was easily the best Beatle in my book.
From all that I surmised - naturally, you could say - that the Cobh players and The Beatles saved my life. Yes, I’m aware some people would say what an unbelievable, incredible dream it was, and I admit it, I really couldn’t disagree with them. I mean, Cobh winning the Champions League, get a grip!
To be dead straight about it, I was never exactly proud about trying to kill myself. Fortunately nobody ever found out then. Now, it’s hardly relevant; I had been a prick.”
tedbro20: As long as we lead the way, it makes things in our control!
Seb: It's a very tough time to fit in among new surroundings, especially with such a key role not just at the club but at a club which is very much at the heart of it's community! It's a lot to handle.