Musicians in football

I've never met anybody in my old band since I died. That is a shame, I guess. I'm going to change that today, though, I'm going to meet up with my old friend Maceo Parker.

Maceo: Hey Jamie, what's going on my brotha?
Me: Been managing soccer in England. I'm doing well, loads of people in London like your music now because of me!
Maceo: Man, you've got an accent going on. How long have you been here?
Me: Since I got the job.
Maceo: Who for?
Me: Dagenham and Redbridge
Maceo: Huh?
Me: I expected you to say that...
Voice: So did I...


Brian: But I have heard of them. I love football.
Maceo: You mean soccer?
Me: He means football.
Maceo: The Brits called it soccer first.
Voice: I didn't know that.


Me: Who are you?
Louis: Louis Tomlinson from One Direction.
Me: What's 'One Direction'?
Louis: You've never heard of One Direction?
Brian: That's a good thing.
Maceo: Louis, you know that James was dead when you started?
Voice: I'm glad-a to see-a you again!


Maceo: HOW MANY PEOPLE ARE HERE?!
Pavarotti: Musicians everywhere!!!
Brian: None of us do the same style either!
Me: Do any of you like soc... football?
Louis: I play for Doncaster Rovers.
Me: I feel sorry for you.
Brian: I support Newcastle, and the fat Italian guy probably supports some Italian team.
Pavarotti: Juventus.
Even when I was alive, I'd never been in a situation weirder than this. Surely this was set up...
Maceo: Well, what I wanted to say is that I would like to help you in your team.
Me: Thanks.
Brian: I guess I may as well help too.
Me: Really.
Louis: Maybe I'll sign for you. Maybe.
Pavarotti: Can I play-a in goal-a?
Me: Well, sorry.
Pavarotti: That is OK-a.

Well, there will never be a situation weirder than this. If this was a coincidence (this can't be a coincidence) then I will sign all Maceo and Brian as coaches.

This story is strange but epic!

Reading Asda God made me realise I need to make this more strange for it to be the strangest. I'm not done with that yet.

October

October was a weird month. During this week there has been no such thing as form, I lost, then I won, then I lost again. However, before a Johnstone Paint match in the second round, I was invited to do a sermon at a church, as you can see above. Does this correlate to the result?

York City 2-0 Daggers
Scott Vernon (11) (York)
Scott Vernon (36) (York)

Coventry City 1-4 Daggers
I am immensely proud of this match.
Callum Wilson (23) (Coventry)
Liam Boyce (25) (Daggers)
Ryan Brown (31) (Daggers)
Ryan Brown (49) (Daggers)
Adam O'Neill (78) (Daggers)

Daggers 0-2 Cambridge
Tom Elliot (30) (Cambridge)
Richard Tait (45) (Cambridge)

Daggers 4-0 Newport County
Adam O'Neill (4) (Daggers)
Femi Ilesanmi (9) (Daggers)
Ryan Brown (31) (Daggers)
Liam Boyce (86) (Daggers)

Portsmouth 3-2 Daggers
Ryan Brown (1) (Daggers)
Pierce Sweeney (9) (Portsmouth)
Liam Boyce (46) (Daggers)
Fahad Rwakarambwe (53) (Portsmouth) (I, for one, hopes he never scores against us again.)
Ryan Taylor (90) (Portsmouth)

Shrewsbury 1-3 Daggers
Adam Evans (19) (Shrewsbury)
Ryan Brown (33) (Daggers)
George Cassidy (55) (Daggers)
Adam O'Neill (87) (Daggers)

The reason we lost all those matches if that we had our best three players called up for the f***cking international youth teams. Because they are youth teams, I can't have the match postponed. Thanks to them, we are out of the automatic promotion places. We are now 4th.

Ryan Brown, our right winger from America, is our player of the month. Don't forget that he is a regen, so this comes up when I search his name in this thing called Google:

James Brown to Blackburn?

James Brown has been made 5/1 favourite to take over at Blackburn Rovers, who recently sacked manager Gary Bowyer due to disastrous form, with Blackburn now 23rd in the Sky Bet Championship.

James Brown, the singer, was resurrected at the start of last season, where he somehow gained knowledge about association football. He took over relegation threatened Dagenham and Redbridge near the end of the season, saving them with 2 games in hand.

This season, his team (projected to finish 17th) lie in 4th place, and challenging for the title. Bookies seem to think that he is the right man for the job at Blackburn, as there aren't many other managers who are interested.

James Brown reject Blackburn

After looking at the facilities around Blackburn Rovers, James Brown has rejected a contract offer given to him by the club, opting to stay with his title push at Dagenham and Redbridge.

With the form that Brown has given to Dagenham and Redbridge, and the disaster that has happened to Blackburn (they are in administration), James Brown may end up facing Blackburn in League 1 next year.

So who will take over Blackburn? Sky Bet predicts that Ian Holloway has a chance, but it is unlikely that there will be any manager interested in this job.