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Schalke: Secret Agent 004

Started on 24 September 2014 by Icarus
Latest Reply on 11 October 2014 by yiliang99
  • POSTS39
  • VIEWS14592
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hahaha, great story mate, respect!
this is gonna be a gr8 story! :D
This is quality mate, loving the story (and the puns!!!)
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Ziechael: Yeee, I love cliff hangers I hope to do many more in the future ;) I just don't want to overuse them too much, as they get repetitive real fast haha.
Feliks: Not only his assistant ;) you'll see hahaha.
Diazepamll: Thanks m9, respect for your 1200 reply story aswell!
Lemto: Haha thanks Lemto, I hope so!
TonkaWolves115: I'm glad you're enjoying it, I've put alot of
effort into it haha.
Can't wait to see how this develops haha




As I turn the switch on, Penelope appears in the midst of the storage room, despite the dust flying around her skin remained untouched, and her hair in perfect condition. What was she actually doing here? If she would report back on my strange behavior the mission could end sooner than later.

Penelope: Sneaking around, I see.

I'm in some deep shit right now, I can feel a shit storm about to brew in and take me out.

David James: I... Got lost, I don't really know where I am.

Penelope: Agent 004, do you really expect me to believe that a highly trained agent like yourself could get "Lost" this easily in a mere football facility? Or should I call you "James Bond".

Yeah, the shit just hit the fan. My heart was racing fast, I was sweating cold... And worse of all, I had left my pistol in the hotel.

James Bond: Alright, who are you? Who do you work for?! Chose your next words very carefully, I've hit woman before.

Penelope: Hm? I work for you, silly. And did you really? Wow, I really didn't make you out to be the aggressive type... Kinda kinky.

James Bond: Explain yourself, this sounds all too confusing right now.

Penelope: I was sent here by M to assist you on this mission, she feared that this time it could have been too much on your plate.

Ugh, I should have known she was involved in this.

Penelope: And I knew that you'd eventually start sneaking around, so I waited for you to pop into the most suspicious storage in the facility. I obviously couldn't talk to you about any of this where there were eyes and ears all over the place.

James Bond: You mean to tell me that the entire building is tapped?

Penelope: Yes, but don't worry about it. My job here is to help you relay information to M faster, I'll take care of the higher offices and document breaching, I know you must have noticed the Chairman acting quite weird, no?

James Bond: He was a right weird fellow, so what should I be doing then?

Penelope: Enjoy your summer! Sink up the Sun, have some fuuun! You look like you really need it anyway, and don't worry once I have a lead to go from we'll take it from there. If you've got caught sneaking about this early the mission would be well compromised, wouldn't it?

She was right, my stay here hadn't been long and I was already gathering suspicious looks about me.

Penelope: Get to know the squad a bit more, coach a few friendlies and earn the staff and board of directors trust - that is what's important right now... Oh and -



She leaned up to me and softly whispered in my ears:I love a curious man, really turns me on.

Penelope: Well, I think this meeting has run it's course! Oh, and next time don't let me wait in a dark room for so long!! Ciaoo.

She ran off giggling. I really had no idea what just happened, I was concious of my actions right up until she leaned in, then my head went hazy. Maybe it had to do with all that had been going on, the day had been long... I'll have to go get my things in the office and head out now, to prepare for tommorows first friendly match.



As I entered my office to take my reports I noticed the doorknob had already been unlocked, and due to the fact that I had been with Penelope the entire time it couldn't have been her... Someone else was inside the room, and they had entered without my permission.

David James: Who goes there? Show yourself, I know there's someone in here!

I said as I entered the office.

???: You... You BASTARD! It-It's all YOUR fault!!!

It was... Peter Hermann?! The ex-Assistant manager that had been sacked. He was back, and he had a bone to pick with me, it seemed.

David James: Whoa, Peter listen I-

He didn't even let me explain, he lunged himself at me - as I tried to fend off rage I tried to call for help, but no one seemed to be in the facilities any longer.



Peter Hermann: I lost EVERYTHING because of you! My JOB, My WIFE, My KIDS!!!... And now... You're about to lose your LIFE!! DIE!

He took a switchblade knife out of his back pocket, and begin to stabbing the air - it seemed his hand-eye coordination was poor, and from the stench of his breath I could probably guess he had been heavily drinking.

David James: Look, you lunatic baffoon! I had nothing to do with it!

I pushed him off of me, he took a big step back and fell on himself... And suddenly, red blood begin to cover the carpets. It seemed he had stabbed himself upon landing on his fall.

David James: Ah Shit! I really didn't need this, not now, not here! Now what...

I had to make this look like an accident, well it actually was an accident! I took my cellphone and called the emergency line, maybe he could still have a shot at living. In no less than 15 minutes the entire building was sorrounded by News reporters, cops, fireman and ambulances - It was a bit too much I thought. The Chairman was also standing besides me, on the "scene of the crime" If you could even call it that.

I gave the authorities my side of the version, the fact he smelled of scotch helped them believe my version - the Chairman also seemed understanding of the situation, he told me to get some rest tonight. I definetly needed it, it had been a... Long day.
holy crap!!!! this story is going to be A-M-A-Z-I-N-G If you keep it as good as this u will sweep the sotm in my view
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Just read through the first few chapters, I've got to say: This. Is. Amazing! I think Avdijaj will be very good for you, he looks great! Good luck :D
No1VilalFan: Thanks m8, I can only pray and hope so haha.
Zed: Thanks! And yeah Avdijaj is literally my favorite player in the club haha.




???: Meh, that new manager... David James was it? we'll see how he does.

He said as he put his drink down on the table.

???: Bah, I've had it... Football is being ruined by all these oil tycoons and sheiks, only way to win nowadays is by having money! financial fair player?! pfft, bullocks.

???: I'll do anything to achieve victory... And that's why I've begun the operation nuclear warheads, we'll craft these very expensive very dangerous missiles and sell them off to extremist countries, in change for big cash!...

He took a sip of his drink and spoke again.

???: In a few years our budgets will allow us to sign the best players in the world... Messi, Ronaldo, and more! we'll become unstoppable... And the best part, is that the plan is bulletproof, right Mrs. Penelope?



Penelope: Mr.Chairman, I've never met a brighter mind than yours this project is fail proof and I hope to see it through alongside you, we'll become the most powerfull football force in the world, not even the likes of Real Madrid and Barcelona will be able to stop our rise.

Chairman: Haha, yes yes... You've been loyal to me from the very begining, your services will not go unpaid.

Penelope: You're too kind Mr.Chairman.

Chairman: Just stay alongside the Manager for now, he seems a bit naive... Make sure that he qualifies for Champions League and keep a tight watch so that he doesn't find out what we're actually up to, in due time all will be unveiled to him, but now is not the time.

Penelope: Of course your excellence, as you say.



Was Penelope a double agent? did she work for M, or for the Chairman...?
Great story. Keep up the good work.
Great story here man!!! I'm having a guess that in true James Bond fashion he will be with that Penelope sooner rather then later
These punts are hilarious haha! Good writing so far, very excited for the next update!
Penelope... that duplicitous bitch! She'd better be a double agent or James is going have to kill her post/mid-coitus as per usual ;)
Hazard: ty will do
LFCfan: thanks :) very soon ;)
Tiffany: gotta keep the story punny haha
Ziechael: ikr, shes getting what she deserves dw ;)

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