Manchester United - Post-Ferguson

I know who it is. It's Fergie!

2013-11-09 19:23#142740 Pauker : I know who it is. It's Fergie!

How did you know?;) Shouldn't you be dropping other things anyway, not comments?;)

The Revolt

Saturday 6th July 2013, 10:47am

There were six of us, Ryan Giggs, Tommy Martin, Steve Round, Paul Scholes, Alan Fettis, and me. We were all angry, very angry. Heading towards Ed Woodward's office, Steve took the lead, forcing his way through the light brown wooden door, and into the line of sight of Ed. In frustration he knocked the over the for elegantly placed pencils and shouted at him...

Steve: "Why the hell have we just seen David driving away from Manchester!?"

Ed: "Well he's been sacked, wasn't that obvious enough?"

Steve: "But Why!? Jesus Ed, he's only just been appointed, he was our future, but, like the Glazers you, don't, give, a fuck!"

Ed: "Steve?"

Steve: "What!?"

Ed: "You're fired, get out."

Steve: "No, no please don't sack me, cause if I'm sacked, I can't QUIT!

Steve Round leaves slamming the door behind him.

Josh: "Ed, what's going on?"

Ed: "Nothing, he didn't fit in with the manager criteria I have."

Josh: "Well, who's his replacement!?"

Ed: "You sir."

Josh: "Youseff? But he's from Egypt and manages some Egyptian team?"

Ed: "Eh? I said you. You are now the manager of Manchester United."

Ryan: "What!?"

Paul:"What!?

Ryan: "No way, no offence Josh, but Ed, he hasn't got the experience!"

Ed: "My decision is final, we either have Josh, or nobody."

Josh: "Guess I have no choice..."

Only five of us left Ed's office after Steve's dismissal, all trying to get into our heads, what had just happened...

haha nice update! like the arguments!

2013-11-11 21:35#143097 The-forgotten-one : haha nice update! like the arguments!

Thanks mate;p

Very good update!

Dream Come True... (1)

Sunday 7th July 2013, 9:00am

BUZZ! BUZZ! BUZZ! BANG! I slapped my alarm clock hoping awful things would happen to it, that's how I felt most mornings, and this was no differ... Oh wait it is different, I'm manager of Manchester United! I had forgotten about yesterdays urm, arguments. It was so surreal. I didn't know what to do, but in the end as I slowly wriggled my way free from my duvets, I decided to ring Moyes to see what the situation was.

Josh: "Hello? David?"

David: "Josh! What a pleasant surprise, how can help."

Josh: "Are you gone for like, good?"

David: "Yes, unfortunaltey, thank you for sticking up for me, you and the rest, who is my replacement?"

Josh: "Me."

David: "What!? Meet me in Majorca tomorrow!"

Josh: "Will do..."

Call Ends...

Meeting with Moyes.

Monday 8th July 2013, 3:42pm

It was warm, the sun was out, lovely breeze, it was a perfect day in Majorca, but that day was covered by instant doom and gloom when he stood next to me, I felt so much guilt, even though I had done nothing. He lent against the railings and look out to the calm bright blue sea that stood before us.

David: "So you're the next manager eh?"

Josh: "Looks that way doesn't it. I'm sorry about it all though, if it was my choice I'd have you instead of me."

David: "No no, Ed has chosen you for a reason, but there is something I need to tell you, something Sir Matt told Sir Alex, something Sir Alex told me, and now, I must tell you..."

He whispered words into my ear...

David: "It may not make sense now, but trust me boy, it will someday. That day will come soon enough for you."

Josh: "Right, okay, so what do I do now."

David: "Well, you need to manage the greatest club that exists..."

Josh: "But what will you do?"

David: "Go back home, to Scotland."

Josh: "Oh I see, well, good luck"

David: "Yeah, I'll need it..."

And so we both left our separate ways, David wondering how his life had just crashed into the ground, and me, wondering what those words meant...

http://www.prestigevillas.com/en/rentals/majorca-villas/port-pollenca/idb/fb77473c4b46f4c2.jpg

Great start and a nice twist introducing the manager slowly like that...can't wait to see how the rest pans out good luck

WHAT DID HE WHISPER?!?!?!?!?!? Nice update mate, keep them coming!

Cheers lads;D

Great updates, I heard it all, I was behind in the stands!

Dream Come True (2)

Tuesday 9th July 2013, 9:00am

The ninth of July, the beginning of the football season, the beginning, of my life. I had my official meeting with Malcolm Glazer then one with the staff, and finally, what could be the toughest, the players...

Malcolm Glazers Office, 9:30am


Malcolm: "Josh, welcome, please, take a seat."

Josh: "Morning sir."

Malcolm: "So, obviously we need to discuss a few things, but first I'd like to properly welcome you to the club, now I know you're a keen United fan, so you know all about the clubs history I assume?"

Josh: "Oh yes, every single bit."

Malcolm: "Well that's all good then, so, you are a new manager, with new visions, with new transfer targets in mind, so, the board and I have come to the conclusion that £34,000,000 would be sufficient, so long as you challenge for the title. We understand that Arsenal, Chelsea and Liverpool have in fact strengthened, and that this season will be a lot tougher than our previous."

Josh: "They sound superb, and even more so, very sensible targets and sums of money. I do feel that I can get the team up around at the top, and I do believe I can go all the way to win it, but still, the given amount is satisfactory."

Malcolm: "We would be willing to increase it in the latter parts of the season if neccesary, but will tackle that when it comes. Now, we understand the philosophies of the club yes? That's why we brought you in as manager, possessive, and attacking football is what we want, and need."

Josh: "Yes that's how I like to play, and that's the way we will play."

Malcolm: "I can feel this season is going to be a grand one, there are press on there way in a couple of hours to meet you, make sure you are ready for that, but your assistant wishes to speak to you, I assume you brought Mr. Round in again with you?"

Josh: "Yes, I didn't want to take the job without him, so yes, he will be staying."

Malcolm: "Okay then, see you soon Josh."

Josh: "See you."


Josh Sleightholm's Office, 10:56am


*Knock Knock*

Josh: "Come in!"

Steve: "Hey boss..."

Josh: "Steve! Welcome back bud."

Steve: "Ahaha, thank you, I was just wondering if you needed help with any jobs around the club?"

Josh: "There is one thing actually, if you could round up all of the other staffs advice, and give it to me once a fortnight, that'd be great."

Steve: "Certainly will, and I have organized a friendly between the reserves and your team if that's ok?"

Josh: "Yes, that's perfect, I could do with having a good look at them. That'll be all for now Steve, have a conference I need to get to!"

Steve: "See's ya' later then."


Manchester United Players Lounge, 11:26am


This was it, my first impression was key to the seasons success, I thought about those words David has said, and took a deep breath and walked in. There was nobody there...

BANG! Whaaaaaaaaaaay! Huge roars exploded from every part of the room, all the players jumped out from behind tables and doors, in their best suits, but they didn't care. Champagne bottles were spurting out liquid gold everywhere. and huge smiles were everyone's faces, they didn't need any jeering up, they were one crazy set of players. By this point I was celebrating like we'd won the Champions League, and had most players piled on top of me, we continued to laugh and shout for the next hour, it was one hell of a time.

Josh: "Well lads, I certainly wasn't expecting that haha!"

Vidic: "Anything for our new gaffer, the champagne complimentary of Wayne's 'lost' money, hahaha!"

Rooney: "So that's were it was you big nosed bastard."

Vidic: "Watch it you scouse bastard hahaha."

Josh: "Well it certainly seems the moral is superb in here"

Anderson: "Of course it is, we can't wait for you to lead us to glory."

Josh: "I'll try my best."

Giggs: "And your best will be good enough for all of us"

Zaha: "Giggs, Nani's just text from hospital, he says your zimmer frames on it's way ahaha."

Giggs: "Cheeky bastard, how is he anyway?"

Zaha: "Got at least another 5 weeks in there."

Giggs: "Poor laddo."

Carrick: "So Josh, what did you want to say?"

Josh: "I just wanted to introduce myself to you all, and reassure any doubters that my lack of experience will hinder our progress, I do hope that isn't the case?"

De Gea: "Surely it will have some affect?"

Josh: "Not at all David, I will take us to the top of the world, this season or the next, I will get us there, mark my words."

Welbeck: "Three Cheers for the Gaffer!"

Whole Team: "Hipp Hipp Hooraay!"

Whole Team: "Hipp Hipp Hooraay!"

Whole Team: "Hipp Hipp Hooraay!"


and so my first managerial day came to a close, and it was a terrific one, but, the hard work started tomorrow...

Three Cheers for the gaffer, HIPPHIPP HOORAAY! HIPPHIPP HOORAAY! HIPPHIPP HOORAAY! Amazing update.

2013-11-16 00:20#144006 paperroute : Three Cheers for the gaffer, HIPPHIPP HOORAAY! HIPPHIPP HOORAAY! HIPPHIPP HOORAAY! Amazing update.

Thanks mate;p