Gerry And The Pacemakers - You'll Never Walk Alone
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Pre-Match Build-Up
2.25 p.m.
Niall Quinn: "This is Niall Quinn reporting from Anfield! I'm taking the place of Martin Tyler today and alongside me for the first time ever is former Liverpool skipper, Jamie Redknapp! What is your opinion on this game?"
Jamie Redknapp: "It is important for Liverpool to start this season with a win but West Ham have just been promoted back up and they want to stay in this league so I expect a close game with both sides fighting for the win. I'd fancy Liverpool to win this one though."
Niall Quinn: "Thanks Jamie. I'm told that the teamsheets have been confirmed. Let's have a look at them."
Niall Quinn: "A few surprises in the Liverpool teamsheet. Jonjo Shelvey is preferred to Joe Allen while Raheem Sterling and Stewart Downing both start ahead of Oussama Assaidi and Fabio Borini. What do you make of that, Jamie?"
Jamie Redknapp: "This is an important game for Liverpool and Ronnie Whelan decides to pick three unfancied players. We all know about Downing and Shelvey and Sterling is a hot prospect for the future. Let's see how they do."
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Pre-Match Team Talk
Me: "You guys know what to do, this is the most important game for us so far. We need a good start for the season. We know how good West Ham are. This time they will play harder than ever. But what I want from you guys is total effore! We have nothing to lose and everything to gain! So go on out there and kick some ass"
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Match Commentary
Niall Quinn: "Out come the players. Kevin Nolan leading West Ham, Steven Gerrard leading The Reds."
Jamie Redknapp: "Its showtime for Whelan's men. Will they win or will they crash and burn?"
"Walk On, Wa-lk On! With Hooooope In Your Hearts, And You'll Ne-ver Walk A-looone! YOU'LL NE-VER WA-LK A-LOOONE"
"Liverpool! Liverpool! Liverpool!"
0' Kick-off: NQ "West Ham starts the match and their Premier League season shooting towards the Kop."
4' Maiga - saved: NQ " O'Neill on the ball. He crosses one in to the box for MAIGA!... What a save from Pepe Reina!" ||| ||| JR " Early warning signals for Liverpool. O'Neill put in an inch-perfect cross and Maiga did well to beat Shelvey in the air but Reina was equal to the shot and got down low to push it away."
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6' Gerrard - yellow: NQ "Colins, Tomkins, Noble and Gerrard has gone straight through Noble! Could this be an early bath for the Liverpool skipper? Just a booking!" ||| ||| JR "There was no need for that! Why did he go through Noble? I know they have history but that was a silly challenge and he is lucky that he is still on the pitch!"
11' Gerrard - miss: NQ "Oh, lovely piece of trickery by Suarez to get past Tomkins! Gerrard, he might have a GO!!... Oh so close for Gerrard!" ||| ||| JR "So unlucky for Gerrard! Suarez did well initially to beat Tomkins and to pick out Gerrard on the edge of the box. He swivelled on the spot and put his shot an inch wide."
17' Suarez - woodwork: NQ "Gerrard whips in the deep free-kick to SUAREZ!!!... What a save from Jaaskelainen and that hit the bar after! Suarez is so unlucky!" ||| ||| JR "It was a brilliant ball in from Gerrard and Suarez was unmarked at the back post but an alert Jaaskelainen keeps that one out!"
"You Know What You Are! You Know What You A-are! Luis Suarez, You Know What You Are!"
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28' Downing - goal: NQ "Shelvey picks out Suarez. He holds up the ball and plays a through ball for DOWNING!!!!... 1-0 Liverpool!!!!" ||| ||| JR " Brilliant vision by Suarez to pick out Downing and from six yards out, he was never going to miss!"
"We love you Liverpool, we do! We love you Liverpool, we DO! OHH, LIVERPOOL WE LOVE YOU!"
30' Maiga - saved: NQ "Jarvis on the left. He crosses for the back post and MAIGA!! Another header saved by Reina! Another great move by West Ham and another chilling stop by the Spanniard."
39' Shelvey - saved: NQ "The ball drops to Shelvey on the edge of the box and he hits it first time!!... Easy save for Jaaskelainen!"
45+2' HT: NQ "Liverpool ahead at the break by a goal to nil! After the break we will return to our pundits for their first half reactions."
"Ohh! Written In The Stars!......"
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Half-Time Team Talk
Me: "You've done well so far lads! We are leading and we have the momentum. Just be carefult that Maiga doesn't get the better of you guys at the back. He has had a few chances already. Jonjo, Raheem, well done so far! You have been solid and I want to see more of the same. Stewart, congrats with the goal! I want more! Luis, Stevie, keep up the pressure on their defence. They crumble quite easily. Pepe, you've been tremendous, keep it up."
"We Love You Whelan, We Do! We Love You Whelan, We DO! OHH, WHELAN WE LOVE YOU!"
46' Kick-off: NQ "Liverpool kick-off shooting towards the Kop End this time!"
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47' Demel - yellow: NQ "Demel appears to have elbowed Downing. That's a booking for the West Ham player!"
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49' Jarvis - goal: NQ "Benayoun has made a lovely through ball for O'Neill! He's gone around Skrtel in the box and centres for JARVIS!!!... The debutant has equalised for the Hammers!! 1-1!!" ||| ||| JR "That was a brilliantly worked goal by West Hame!! Benayoun played the perfect ball for O'Neill who goes past Skrtel all too easily and he centres for Jarvis who prods home past the helpless Reina!"
"The Boys Are Back In Town, The Boys Are Back In Town!... The Boys Are Back In Tooo-ooown!!! The Boys Are Back In Town!!!!
57' Substitution: NQ "James Collins will have to go off injured and it will be Mohammed Diame to come on for his debut."
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James Collins (#19)
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Mohammed Diame (#21)
63' Substitution: NQ "Jordan Spence will replace Gary O'Neill."
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Gary O'Neill (#32)
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Jordan Spence (#27)
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65' Maiga - yellow: NQ "Maiga shoves Shelvey and that will be a booking!"
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83' Gerrard - goal: NQ "Johnson to Sahin. He picks out GERRARD!!!..... MR. Liverpool!!!! It just had to be him to score!" ||| ||| JR "There was just no stopping that, was there? It was a perfect goal, created by Sahin and finished by the skipper, Steven Gerrard!"
"Steeeve GERRARD, GERRARD!! He Can Pass The ball Forty Yard! He's Big And He's Fucking Hard! Steve GERRARD, GERRARD!!!
83' Substitution: NQ "Henderson is coming on for Shelvey. A good shift put in by the youngster today."
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Jonjo Shelvey (#33)
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Jordan Henderson (#14)
90+4 FT: NQ "Liverpool win thanks to Steven Gerrard! After the break is match analysis from the guys up in the sky!"
Ohh! Written In The Stars!!...."
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Post-Match Team Talk
Me: "Well done guys! That was a good way to win. I won't lie, I was never worried because I knew we would get the goal."
Colin Pascoe: "Well done guys! You didn't let your heads drop and I'm so proud of you!"
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Post-Match Interview
Me: "We played very well today and I'm pleased we got the win. Credit has to go to West Ham for never giving up because they gave us a tough game. I'm proud of my boys for not letting their heads drop when West Ham scored and Stevie eventually got the winner."
Gary Lineker: "So now we go to Anfield where Liverpool faced newly-promoted West Ham."
Gary Lineker: "Liverpool's first goal, what did you think of it Alan Hansen?"
Alan Hansen: "Its a nice, qucik, short passing move from Liverpool originally. Shelvey passes to Suarez who drags the ball away from Collins while turning towards him which is a difficult skill. He then spots the run from Downing here, and he finds him who finishes well."
Gary Lineker: "West Ham did equalise though, do you want to run us through their goal Alan Shearer?"
Alan Shearer: "The goal starts off with Benayoun running down the wing. He spots Gary O'Neill making a run in to the box and he plays the ball ahead of him. He beat Skrtel with a change of direction and he centres for an un-marked Jarvis to score."
Gary Lineker: "Steven Gerrard's goal was the decider. Let's have a look. Johnson is on the right wing but can't run with the ball so he gives it to Sahin. He looks up straight away and picks out Gerrard in the box who scores first time."
Gary Lineker: "Let's have a look at the Premier League table after Day One."
Gary Lineker: "Liverpool one of just five teams to win their openning game so far. Do you guys think Liverpool will finish in the Top Four?"
Alan Hansen: "They have some good players and a good manager so I don't see why not. It will be tough with so many teams fighting for those spots but I genuinely believe that they can pull it off."
Alan Shearer: "I don't think they'll make it but they won't be far off. There are other teams in a better place than Liverpool right now."
Gary Lineker: "That's all we have time for tonight. Make sure you hang on for Manish and "The Football League Show". Thank you and bye bye."
Episode Fifteen - This Is Anfield
18th August 2012
Pre-Match Build-Up
2.25 p.m.
Niall Quinn: "This is Niall Quinn reporting from Anfield! I'm taking the place of Martin Tyler today and alongside me for the first time ever is former Liverpool skipper, Jamie Redknapp! What is your opinion on this game?"
Jamie Redknapp: "It is important for Liverpool to start this season with a win but West Ham have just been promoted back up and they want to stay in this league so I expect a close game with both sides fighting for the win. I'd fancy Liverpool to win this one though."
Niall Quinn: "Thanks Jamie. I'm told that the teamsheets have been confirmed. Let's have a look at them."
Niall Quinn: "A few surprises in the Liverpool teamsheet. Jonjo Shelvey is preferred to Joe Allen while Raheem Sterling and Stewart Downing both start ahead of Oussama Assaidi and Fabio Borini. What do you make of that, Jamie?"
Jamie Redknapp: "This is an important game for Liverpool and Ronnie Whelan decides to pick three unfancied players. We all know about Downing and Shelvey and Sterling is a hot prospect for the future. Let's see how they do."
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Pre-Match Team Talk
Me: "You guys know what to do, this is the most important game for us so far. We need a good start for the season. We know how good West Ham are. This time they will play harder than ever. But what I want from you guys is total effore! We have nothing to lose and everything to gain! So go on out there and kick some ass"
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Match Commentary
Niall Quinn: "Out come the players. Kevin Nolan leading West Ham, Steven Gerrard leading The Reds."
Jamie Redknapp: "Its showtime for Whelan's men. Will they win or will they crash and burn?"
"Walk On, Wa-lk On! With Hooooope In Your Hearts, And You'll Ne-ver Walk A-looone! YOU'LL NE-VER WA-LK A-LOOONE"
"Liverpool! Liverpool! Liverpool!"
/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\
0' Kick-off: NQ "West Ham starts the match and their Premier League season shooting towards the Kop."
4' Maiga - saved: NQ " O'Neill on the ball. He crosses one in to the box for MAIGA!... What a save from Pepe Reina!" ||| ||| JR " Early warning signals for Liverpool. O'Neill put in an inch-perfect cross and Maiga did well to beat Shelvey in the air but Reina was equal to the shot and got down low to push it away."
6' Gerrard - yellow: NQ "Colins, Tomkins, Noble and Gerrard has gone straight through Noble! Could this be an early bath for the Liverpool skipper? Just a booking!" ||| ||| JR "There was no need for that! Why did he go through Noble? I know they have history but that was a silly challenge and he is lucky that he is still on the pitch!"11' Gerrard - miss: NQ "Oh, lovely piece of trickery by Suarez to get past Tomkins! Gerrard, he might have a GO!!... Oh so close for Gerrard!" ||| ||| JR "So unlucky for Gerrard! Suarez did well initially to beat Tomkins and to pick out Gerrard on the edge of the box. He swivelled on the spot and put his shot an inch wide."
17' Suarez - woodwork: NQ "Gerrard whips in the deep free-kick to SUAREZ!!!... What a save from Jaaskelainen and that hit the bar after! Suarez is so unlucky!" ||| ||| JR "It was a brilliant ball in from Gerrard and Suarez was unmarked at the back post but an alert Jaaskelainen keeps that one out!"
"You Know What You Are! You Know What You A-are! Luis Suarez, You Know What You Are!"
28' Downing - goal: NQ "Shelvey picks out Suarez. He holds up the ball and plays a through ball for DOWNING!!!!... 1-0 Liverpool!!!!" ||| ||| JR " Brilliant vision by Suarez to pick out Downing and from six yards out, he was never going to miss!""We love you Liverpool, we do! We love you Liverpool, we DO! OHH, LIVERPOOL WE LOVE YOU!"
30' Maiga - saved: NQ "Jarvis on the left. He crosses for the back post and MAIGA!! Another header saved by Reina! Another great move by West Ham and another chilling stop by the Spanniard."
39' Shelvey - saved: NQ "The ball drops to Shelvey on the edge of the box and he hits it first time!!... Easy save for Jaaskelainen!"
45+2' HT: NQ "Liverpool ahead at the break by a goal to nil! After the break we will return to our pundits for their first half reactions."
"Ohh! Written In The Stars!......"
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Half-Time Team Talk
Me: "You've done well so far lads! We are leading and we have the momentum. Just be carefult that Maiga doesn't get the better of you guys at the back. He has had a few chances already. Jonjo, Raheem, well done so far! You have been solid and I want to see more of the same. Stewart, congrats with the goal! I want more! Luis, Stevie, keep up the pressure on their defence. They crumble quite easily. Pepe, you've been tremendous, keep it up."
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
"We Love You Whelan, We Do! We Love You Whelan, We DO! OHH, WHELAN WE LOVE YOU!"
46' Kick-off: NQ "Liverpool kick-off shooting towards the Kop End this time!"
47' Demel - yellow: NQ "Demel appears to have elbowed Downing. That's a booking for the West Ham player!" 49' Jarvis - goal: NQ "Benayoun has made a lovely through ball for O'Neill! He's gone around Skrtel in the box and centres for JARVIS!!!... The debutant has equalised for the Hammers!! 1-1!!" ||| ||| JR "That was a brilliantly worked goal by West Hame!! Benayoun played the perfect ball for O'Neill who goes past Skrtel all too easily and he centres for Jarvis who prods home past the helpless Reina!""The Boys Are Back In Town, The Boys Are Back In Town!... The Boys Are Back In Tooo-ooown!!! The Boys Are Back In Town!!!!
57' Substitution: NQ "James Collins will have to go off injured and it will be Mohammed Diame to come on for his debut."
James Collins (#19)
Mohammed Diame (#21)63' Substitution: NQ "Jordan Spence will replace Gary O'Neill."
Gary O'Neill (#32)Jordan Spence (#27) 65' Maiga - yellow: NQ "Maiga shoves Shelvey and that will be a booking!" 83' Gerrard - goal: NQ "Johnson to Sahin. He picks out GERRARD!!!..... MR. Liverpool!!!! It just had to be him to score!" ||| ||| JR "There was just no stopping that, was there? It was a perfect goal, created by Sahin and finished by the skipper, Steven Gerrard!""Steeeve GERRARD, GERRARD!! He Can Pass The ball Forty Yard! He's Big And He's Fucking Hard! Steve GERRARD, GERRARD!!!
83' Substitution: NQ "Henderson is coming on for Shelvey. A good shift put in by the youngster today."
Jonjo Shelvey (#33)Jordan Henderson (#14)90+4 FT: NQ "Liverpool win thanks to Steven Gerrard! After the break is match analysis from the guys up in the sky!"
Ohh! Written In The Stars!!...."
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Post-Match Team Talk
Me: "Well done guys! That was a good way to win. I won't lie, I was never worried because I knew we would get the goal."
Colin Pascoe: "Well done guys! You didn't let your heads drop and I'm so proud of you!"
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Post-Match Interview
Me: "We played very well today and I'm pleased we got the win. Credit has to go to West Ham for never giving up because they gave us a tough game. I'm proud of my boys for not letting their heads drop when West Ham scored and Stevie eventually got the winner."
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Gary Lineker: "So now we go to Anfield where Liverpool faced newly-promoted West Ham."
Gary Lineker: "Liverpool's first goal, what did you think of it Alan Hansen?"
Alan Hansen: "Its a nice, qucik, short passing move from Liverpool originally. Shelvey passes to Suarez who drags the ball away from Collins while turning towards him which is a difficult skill. He then spots the run from Downing here, and he finds him who finishes well."
Gary Lineker: "West Ham did equalise though, do you want to run us through their goal Alan Shearer?"
Alan Shearer: "The goal starts off with Benayoun running down the wing. He spots Gary O'Neill making a run in to the box and he plays the ball ahead of him. He beat Skrtel with a change of direction and he centres for an un-marked Jarvis to score."
Gary Lineker: "Steven Gerrard's goal was the decider. Let's have a look. Johnson is on the right wing but can't run with the ball so he gives it to Sahin. He looks up straight away and picks out Gerrard in the box who scores first time."
Gary Lineker: "Let's have a look at the Premier League table after Day One."
Gary Lineker: "Liverpool one of just five teams to win their openning game so far. Do you guys think Liverpool will finish in the Top Four?"
Alan Hansen: "They have some good players and a good manager so I don't see why not. It will be tough with so many teams fighting for those spots but I genuinely believe that they can pull it off."
Alan Shearer: "I don't think they'll make it but they won't be far off. There are other teams in a better place than Liverpool right now."
Gary Lineker: "That's all we have time for tonight. Make sure you hang on for Manish and "The Football League Show". Thank you and bye bye."
although not exactly 1000...
