Stories For This Week:
Walter's Oriental Lisbon - One Step Closer
fmhunter's Everton FC: Vodka Martinez, Shaken, Not Stirred.
jasonvilla4ever's Manchester United: What The Hell Do We Do Now
TVDLC123' The Red Journey
CarlosV96's My Grandfather's Legacy - The Other Mourinho Takes on Portugal
AaronHJFT96's Napoli - Something Worth Fighting For!
Oriental Lisbon - One Step Closer
If you thought football could not get any crazier, you clearly have not read this story! Portuguese side Oriental Lisbon hired Vitor Martins as their manager in what can be said were truly unusual circumstances. Dead-set on impressing his new boss, Martins set himself the objective of winning the league in one season. There was no time to waste for Vitor as he immediately set about creating a new affiliation with CD Aves of the Second Division. Martins' first real test came against Leixões but his side easily dispatched their opposition to bring a bright start to their first campaign under the new manager.
Walter's writing skills are fantastic and his story is very enjoyable to read. He gives us plenty of information to digest, and he keeps it all very interesting at the same time, which is very hard to accomplish. As this story is still in it's early days, I feel that is perhaps too early to comment fully on the presentation of each update, but I am pleased with what I have seen so far. Walter has also thrown himself in to the world of graphic-making, and his work so far is quite good. Hopefully we can see some more of his graphic making in the future, as it will really add to his story. Overall, I think that Walter's story has the potential to become a real favourite on this site. His work so far has bee tremendous and is sure to be a contender for SotM in the future.
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Oriental Lisbon - One Step Closer
Everton FC: Vodka Martinez, Shaken, Not Stirred.
After the departure of long-lasting manager David Moyes, Everton's chairman Bill Kenwright felt that the young Spanish coach Roberto Martínez was the right man to replace him. He quickly got to work to improve his side for the upcoming side by signing Guerrero and Riera for his squad. News of a new stadium no it's way couldn't overshadow Everton's shaky start to the season, however, and they found themselves 14th after September. Despite long-term injuries to key members of the squad, Martínez's men finally started to find some form and by the end of November, had climbed up to a very respectable 7th position.
fmhunter produces some fantastic content for his story, and his writing is not bad either. He gives us all the facts as we need to know them and he gives us plenty of updates to digest, despite his story being less than a week old. He presents his updates very well, and they are very easy to read and decipher. Graphically, he uses bbcodes very well throughout his story and he makes reading easy for us. This story has a lot of potential and this could be a SotM favourite if fmhunter continues in the same form. Hopefully he can continue improving his story writing abilities, and become a great writer!
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Everton FC: Vodka Martineze, Shaken, Not Stirred.
Manchester United: What The Hell Do We Do Now
It was all doom and gloom for Manchester United fans as Sir Alex Ferguson retired after a magnificent managerial career in charge of the Red Devils. With a lot of speculation as to who would replace the Scot's big boots, it was Liverpool's Brendan Rodgers who got the job, in a surprise turn of events. (In the past week) Manchester United have kept battling for a top four finish, while also topping their Champions League group. With a lot of ins and outs in January, including the sale of cult hero Wayne Rooney, Utd kept clawing for a top four spot, but dramas involving Solskjaer and Marriner have hurt the club's reputation. Rodgers has a lot to do to rescue Utd's season, can he and his new-look Man Utd team do it?
We get plenty of information from the writer in this story. We find out what players he wants to sign, and what players he wants to leave. He creates a lot of drama, and it isn't bad. He puts a lot of work in to his writing, which you can see, and he has done well. The presentation is quite good and you can follow it easily enough. He uses a lot of pictures, which is good for the visual readers too. Overall, I think the story is quite good. I think that jasonvilla4ever can develop it further, and I wouldn't be surprised if this story earned a rave-review in the future.
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Manchester United: What The Hell Do We Do Now
The Red Journey
Red Star Belgrade is one of the most historical clubs in football history, and TVDLC123's story does it justice. (In the past week) Red Star has moved to the top of the league with some demolishing domestic victories. The East European club stunned Swansea in a Europa League group match and more good news came when it was announced that their facilities would receive a nice upgrade. The Reds kept up their rampant form and were top of the league after seven games. They are looking to win the league this year and judging by their early season form, it does look likely.
Content makes stories and TVDLC123 gives us plenty of it. We get absolutely fantastic in-depth reports of each game which gives us a true insight in to what happened over the course of the ninety minutes. This style might not appeal to some people, such as those who just wish to skim through results, but there are plenty of people who enjoy reading bulk writing, which is provided here. The graphics for each post are good, although I would like to see a little more to split the writing and to add more colour to the story. I think that this story has potential and it is already a good read.
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The Red Journey
My Grandfather's Legacy - The Other Mourinho Takes on Portugal
Just from reading the title, I'm already interested in this story. Daniel Mourinho is the son of the world famous manager José Mourinho, although he has never met him. In his pursuit to connect with his father, he takes the reigns of Portuguese third division side Varzim SC. Daniel quickly set about making the club in to his own shape and design. After a cracking start to the season, Varzim were second after five games. However, inconsistency set in and they finished the first phase of the season just outside the top two. With a lot of drama occurring off the pitch in Daniel Mourinho's personal life, you can expect a lot to happen in this story in the future.
I have enjoyed reading this story so far. I think that as a drama story, it has a lot of potential. Content-wise, there is a good bit, but a lot of it is based on the story rather than the save. There is nothing wrong with this, but CarlosV96 just needs to be careful that he is writing through his enjoyment for the save first and foremost, in order to get the most enjoyment out of writing this story. In terms of graphics, Carlos uses a lot of pictures and he uses screenshots very wisely. Overall, I do believe that this story has potential to become a good one, given some time and development. Be sure to watch out for future updates here!
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My Grandfather's Legacy - The Other Mourinho Takes on Portugal
Napoli - Something Worth Fighting For!
Nobody expected Rafa Benítez to be shown the door by Napoli's board so soon after being hired, and nobody expected Roberto Baggio to be hired in his place. The passionate Italian had a vision for I Ciucciarelli. (In the past week) Napoli's fans have been rejoicing in the aftermath of their club's third ever Serie A victory. Reporters have already announced their opinions on Napoli for next season, but none of them are good, surprisingly. however, Baggio is out to prove them wrong and has already brought in Roberto Pereyra, Pierre Emile Hojbjerg, Koen Casteels and Dodo in to give his side every chance of holding on to the Serie A title. Can De Azzurri prove their worth in Europe this season and push for the final rounds? We all believe in Baggio's ability to produce!
This is currently one of my favourite stories around. AaronHJFT96 produces brilliant content in some quality writing for us readers and critics. Despite some grammar errors here and there, he is one of the most gifted writers around FM Scout right now and he is proving his worth with every passing update. He has a very unique presentation for his updates, but it is one which I enjoy tremendously. Just like Walter, AaronHJFT96 is beginning to use graphics in his story to improve the visual side of it. I think that this story has a lot of potential to become a SotM candidate in the future.
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Napoli - Something Worth Fighting For!
So that is our round-up of FM Stories for this week. I hope that you enjoyed this and if you wrote one of the stories above, that you perhaps learned where you could improve your technique. Just remember, this is just the opinion of myself, the judge, and others could very well have a different opinion. Don't let any criticism put you down, it is all intended to help you! Every story included here is a good one and one everybody enjoys reading.
For those of you who are wondering what each of the grades mean, I will explain.
Content: This is the story itself; the details of what go on in your save and in your story. This involves results, transfers, injuries, conflict, dramas, fiction. Everything you can write about is content. The more relevant content you post, the higher your grade. Also, if you produce a good amount of content, you will also get a high grade.
Writing: How effective is your writing? To ensure that you earn a high grade in the writing category, you need to make sure that you do not have many spelling/grammar mistakes, and that you use language which people can understand but which also catches the imagination of the readers. If you want to keep a loyal audience of readers, you must give them a reason to enjoy your story. Use exciting language, don't bore them.
Presentation: This is how you lay out your updates, especially 'result updates'. It is important that you make your updates easy to read through and make the information/content easy to follow and find. A well-structured story will have more content readers than a sloppy, messy story. Try to give your story order, keep everything easy to follow.
Visual: This is the image side of the story. Do you use enough screenshots/pictures? People will get bored of a story which consists of just large chunks of text. To keep your story colourful, a good banner and high-quality resolution screenshots are in order. On top of that, you can use graphics which you can make in Photoshop/GIMP/Others to keep your story fresh and exciting. Readers enjoy well-made graphics, and they can really give you a good fanbase.
Overall: This is the mark for your story as a whole. It isn't affected totally by other categories, as some are more important than others. If you are scoring four stars or higher, you have a brilliant story. Three stars to three and a half stars is a good story, while anything below is a work-in-progress. Don't be disheartened if you are not hitting the high grades. The best thing about story writing here is that you can always improve, no matter how skilled or how old you are. Keep working hard and your story will improve, which only leads to more readers, more praise and more recognition.
Discussion: FM Story Weekly 11/05/14
2 comments have been posted so far.